Day 6: Go positive

Two of the most common New Year Resolutions are 'Give up smoking' and 'Lose weight'.  What do these two resolutions have in common?  They are both about loss.  While laudible goals, the way that they are expressed is potentially risky for actually achieving the goal.  The problem is that they are expressed in terms of what the person no longer wants.

Tip 6:  State your goal in the positive

There is an old adage which states, 'You get what you focus on'.  If you express your goal in terms of what you want to lose/give up/stop doing,  you are actually continuing to focus on the very thing that you don't want.  (It's like telling the footballer who is about to take a penalty, 'Don't miss').  

Instead, express your goal in terms of what you do want,  not what you don't.  The mind can concentrate better when it has something to work towards.  'Nature abhors a vacuum', so if your goal is about giving something up, then replace that 'hole' with a positive alternative.

Here are some examples:

Turn 'Lose 10 pounds' to 'Weigh 12 stone by July'

Turn 'Give up smoking' to 'Be a clean air breather'

Turn 'Stop shouting at my kids' to 'Express my frustration in a way that works'

Turn 'Don't join in with others' cynicism' to 'Always provide an optimistic view'